The Mad Chatters Mad Monologue

Smokin' Joe Frazier - RIP

Wed, 09 Nov 2011 04:57:00 GMT

BOXING legend Smokin' Joe Frazier has died after a short bout with liver cancer, aged 67.

Philly's favourite son reigned as undisputed heavyweight champ during the division's toughest era, won gold at the 1964 Rome Olympics and slugged it out with bitter rival Muhammad Ali in an epic trilogy that started with the brutal "Fight of the Century" at Madison Square Garden in 1971 and ended four years later with the savage "Thrilla in Manilla".

BOXING legend Smokin' Joe Frazier has died after a short bout with liver cancer, aged 67.

They almost killed each other.

Not surprisingly, Smokin Joe's hall-of-fame career inside the ring overshadows the rest of his life. However, he didn't just entertain us with his fists. It's now part of Hollywood folklore that Sylvester Stallone was inspired to make Rocky after watching bloody punching bag Chuck Wepner miraculously go fifteen rounds with Ali.

However, parts of Rocky Balboa were lifted straight out of Frazier's life. Struggling on the mean streets of Philly - Joe Frazier. Working in a slaughterhause - Joe Frazier. Running up the steps of the Philadelphia Museum of Art - Joe Frazier.

Frazier didn't get a screen credit for Rocky but he did score a memorable cameo, introduced to the crowd as "one of the immortals of pugilism" before the Creed v Balboa title fight.

Visit: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D5qVrP0xlGE

Long after he'd retired, Smokin' Joe worked Mr. T's corner for his ten-round fight with "Rowdy" Roddy Piper at Wrestlemania 2. Mr. T was declared the winner on points and the bout ended in chaos with an all-in brawl. For perhaps the only time in his life, Frazier tried to stop a fight!

Smokin Joe's iconic status was confirmed when he appeared on The Simpson's to present Homer with with "The First Annual Montgomery Burns Award for Outstanding Achievement in the Field of Excellence." He also revealed a softer side when consoling Homer, devastated after losing his couch, comparing it to the emptyiness and heartbreak he felt after losing his belt to George Foreman.

Later, Smokin' Joe got into a fight with Springfield's resident drunk Barney Gumble at Moe's Tavern. Barney, who had been "riding [him] all night" ended up seeing stars and dumped in a rubbish bin.

Ali immortalized Smokin' Joe in verse and many rappers have name-checked him since. Perhaps the best known is by Inspectah Deck, who kicks off the Wu-Tang Clan's classic posse cut "Protect Ya Neck" with this unforgettable line:

I smoke on the mic like Smokin' Joe Frazier...

Thanks for the memories, Smokin' Joe.

What did you love about the champ?

International Rules or International Snooze?

Thu, 03 Nov 2011 21:40:00 GMT

The AFL should do the humane thing and put International Rules out of its misery after the second and final test tonight on the Gold Coast tonight. It has no relevance and I think it's more like International Snooze than International Rules.

The AFL should do the humane thing and put International Rules out of its misery after the second and final test tonight on the Gold Coast.

This mongrel breed of Australian Rules and Gaelic Football has finally lost its novelty value after thirteen years. It’s like the houseguest who long outstays their welcome: good value at first but after a while they become annoying as hell. Eventually, it gets to the point where you just want them to piss off and never come back.

Only 22,976 fans rocked up to Etihad Stadium in Melbourne for the first test last Friday night to see see an under-strength Ireland smash an under-strength Australia by 44 points. Two records were set that night: the lowest International Rules crowd on Australian soil and the biggest winning margin between the two countries.

Not that anybody cares: not the clubs, not the players, not the fans.

Dejavu perhaps? You bet. Between 1984-1990, Australia and Ireland played several three match test series of the hybrid code, which was killed off by poor crowds and a general lack of interest before being revived in 1998 just as the last rites were being read to State-of-Origin footy.

International Rules was seen as a chance to reward players chosen in the annual All-Australian team, a ceremonial team that never played a game.

Those early Australian teams boasted genuine superstars and premiership players along with All-Australians. But it soon became clear that the high-octane game suited a certain type of player. There was no room for big units like ruckmen and key-position players.

Kamikaze pinball demanded fast, mobile and highly-skilled footballers and, after losing three of the four series upon the resumption of play, Australia changed tack, stacking its squads with midfielders to match Ireland’s mosquito fleet.

That’s okay when you’ve got the likes of Nathan Buckley, Andrew McLeod and Mark Ricciuto pulling on the green and gold (and navy blue) guernsey.

But it’s definitely not okay when you’ve got a second-rate squad that includes an 18 year-old rookie from the wooden-spooners among a list of no-names you've probably never heard of.

No wonder John Q. Citizen stayed away.

International Rules is now just an expensive recruitment drive by the AFL to entice young Irish lads to try their luck with the Sherrin.

The money wasted on the series would be better spent on junior development, that’s if the AFL first didn’t blow it all on ambitious expansion plans that include far-flung places like New Zealand, South Africa and Mars.

Is it just me or has the International Rules become no longer relevant....again!!

Aussie Brad Wing Denied Touchdown For Early Celebration - Is This The Dumbest Rule in World Sport

Thu, 03 Nov 2011 09:45:00 GMT

Surely this is the dumbest rule in world sport!! Aussie Brad Wing was denied a touchdown for celebrating early. You need to watch this for yourself and make your own mind up. I think it's stupid and feel a bit bad for the Aussie who is making a real go of it in College Football.

Click on the play button below.

Poor old Brad. However, he seems like a great bloke and I'm glad he's making it big in the U.S. Below is another great video of the Aussie.

So what are your thoughts? A dumb rule or what??

Do The Crime So Do The Time - Salman Butt and Mohammad Asif Found Guilty

Tue, 01 Nov 2011 21:28:00 GMT

Former Pakistan cricket captain Salmon Butt and fellow Pakistani quick Mohammad Asif have been found guilty over night in the Southwark Crown Court of match fixing. I believe any player caught deliberately conspiring to change the outcome of a match, whether they succeed at changing the match or not, should not pass go, should not collect $200 and be sent directly to jail. Congratulations Southwark Crown Court!!

Butt was convicted of conspiracy to obtain and accept corrupt payments and conspiracy to cheat at gambling. Mohammad Asif was found guilty of conspiracy to cheat. These criminal charges have landed the two former international players in very hot water and they could be imprisoned for seven years.

The prosecutors successfully alleged in court that Butt and Asif conspired with team mate Mohammad Aamer and a British agent Mazher Majeed to bowl some no-balls in the Test Match between Pakistan and England at Lords in August 2010 – not a nice thing to do at the home of cricket!!

Butt and Asif pleaded not guilty. Aamer and Majeed will be put through the courts in their own criminal trials in due course.

In 2011, both the AFL and NRL have had dramas with match fixing and players betting on matches. How dumb or greedy must these players really be. Any action that is likely to result in questioning the transparency of a match or sport should be hammered by the police and the criminal justice system.

This is white collar crime crossing over into blue collar sports and it must be stopped.

I for one congratulate the now defunct News of the World tabloid in London for outing these cheats from Pakistan. They confirmed what many of us have suspected for years. It is now time for the legal system in Australia and around the world to treat any cheating sportsmen in the same way as members of the public as they will now do in England after last night’s precedent.

Sportspeople should be subjected to the same rules as everyone else but it seems a high proportion of athletes get off or get off lightly. The courts need to close the gap and get rid of these pelicans who think they are above the rules. Think of Todd Carney and Brendan Fevola - if they were nobodies I believe they would be locked up by now like many others blokes who have done stupid things. However, the keep getting second chances because they play footy. It's wrong - close the gap!!

By the way, what do you call a Pakistan fast bowler who doesn’t cheat….Asif…

The Living Legend of Warwick Capper

Thu, 27 Oct 2011 07:27:00 GMT

Warwick, you’re fired!

And with those three words, minted finance guru Mark Bouris pretty much fired everybody on The Celebrity Apprentice Australia, including himself.

Warwick, you’re fired!

And with those three words, minted finance guru Mark Bouris pretty much fired everybody on The Celebrity Apprentice Australia, including himself.

No Warwick Capper, no show.

Channel 9’s latest trashfest pulled an impressive 1.3m viewers for its first episode. No doubt some people tuned in to see beauty pageant queen Jesinta Campbell get around in a bikini. But most would’ve been watching to see “one of the biggest personalities in Australia” strut his stuff.

Capper has been strutting his stuff now for almost thirty years, ever since he made his VFL debut for the Sydney Swans back in 1983. His Gold Coast tan, blonde mullet, white boots and ball-chaffing tight red shorts made him both a fan favourite and obvious target for rival players and supporters alike.

Those speckies! Pulling himself up on the shoulders of opposition players to take a screamer became a Capper trademark, often punctuated by triumphantly raising the Sherrin above his head in one hand.Even though he couldn’t kick over a jam jar, #39 booted 388 goals in 124 games for the Swans and Brisbane Bears between 1983-1991 with a career best 103 goals in 1987.

Make no mistake: Capper could play.

Not that he gets any credit for his football ability these days. Hell, he didn’t get much credit for it back in the day either. He was the player - no, make that cocky lair - you loved to hate. Loved, hated, Capper didn’t care so long as he was the centre of attention; attention he craved like a smackie fiending for a hit.

Capper’s off-field notoriety has completely over-shadowed his playing career. Looking back, there were hints of things to come during his playing days. Even before he became the Swans pin-up boy he released a pop single.

On his website, Capper claims “I Only Take What’s Mine” went (multi) platinum, selling 300,000 copies. This would make it one of the top three selling singles of all-time by an Australian artist. Surprisingly, it’s nowhere to be found on ARIA’s official gold and platinum records accreditation list. Must be an oversight.

A highly-publicized cameo in Neighbours at the height of its pop-culture phenomenon further boosted Capper’s profile. Playing himself, he had a scene in the coffee shop with another nascent star, some chick called Kylie Minogue.

Since retiring, Capper has stayed in the spotlight using every bit of shameless self-promotion available to him, including:

Posing nude with then wife Joanne for Australian Penthouse.
Appearing on any TV show that will have him, especially The Footy Show.
Writing a critically-acclaimed, best-selling autobiography Fool Forward.
Penning a highly-respected sports column for Zoo Weekly magazine.
Having plastic surgery which made him look “fifteen years younger”.
Working as a Gold Coast meter-maid in a skimpy, shimmering gold outfit.
Exposing himself to other housemates on Celebrity Big Brother (and getting immediately evicted).
Making his own XXX-porno with a girlfriend nearly half his age (the 69-minute Warwick Capper Uncut is available at all good adult stores.)

Capper gets away with all this crazy stuff because he’s such a harmless clown. He’s a man-child, a wide-eyed, immature fourteen year-old boy trapped in the body of a middle-aged man, who’ll never grow up. Peter Pan with a mullet.

That’s not to say Capper hasn’t had a crack at a legit career post-footy. In 2006, he tried to make the difficult transition to bona fide actor, starring alongside Mark “Jacko” Jackson and the late, great Bill Hunter in the blockbuster action comedy Yobbos Up the Guts! Director Kayran Noskca quit mid-shoot after Capper broke his nose in a punch-up on set. The film has never seen the light of day.

The next year, he ran for Gold Coast Mayor against incumbent Ron Clarke, the former champion runner, and an Elvis impersonator. Legalizing prostitution was one of his main election policies. He didn’t win. Undeterred, Capper had another crack at public office in 2009. After the former Member of Oxley Pauline Hanson officially announced she was contesting the seat of Beaudesert in the Queensland State Election, Capper put his hand up. Backed by Zoo and with Jacko as his campaign manager, the big plans of Warwick Capper MP came unstuck when he forgot to register with the Election Commission by the midday, March 3 deadline.

Which brings us to Celebrity Apprentice.

Two teams of Z-list fame-whores, including PR sleaze Max Markson, the first lady of funny-as-cancer comedy Julia Morris and Marcia Hines’ singing daughter Deni, were split into boys and girls teams for a winner takes all car-wash challenge.

Fair’s fair: they all worked their arses off. Well, most of them did. Our Warwick was too busy getting massages from skanky Zoo models to wash cars. Plus, he had a dislocated finger.

All up, the teams raised an impressive $166,000 for charity. The girls won, thanks mainly to “Please explain” Pauline pulling in fifty-grand by washing a car in AussieBum bikini bottoms. Markson led the boys team with thirty-six big ones. Capper brought in twenty bucks.

Bouris really had no choice but to fire his lazy arse, which was unfortunate but not exactly unexpected. After all, this is Warwick Capper we’re talking about.

Don’t worry, "The Wiz" won’t be off our screens for too long. He’ll be back next year in a new reality TV show, which promises to catapult him to same trashy orbit as Paris Hilton, Nicole Ritchie and the Kardashians. Supernova Capper will outshine these stars.

Keep an eye out for Warwick’s World, coming soon.

Are you a fan of Warwick Capper?

Shut Up Ray Hadley - Stick To Rugby League

Wed, 26 Oct 2011 03:07:00 GMT

Verbal diarrhoea is a painful social affliction whereby its sufferers just won’t shut the hell up. It annoys and alienates victims who will desperately look for any excuse to get away from a dizzying full-frontal attack. But there’s no escape from the comfy surroundings of your own home on a Sunday night when you just want to plonk yourself on the lounge in front of the telly, relax and unwind before the working week ahead.

Ray Hadley’s machine-gun call of the Rugby World Cup semi-final was even worse than the Wallabies bumbling, fumbling, stumbling 20-6 loss to the All-Blacks.

The shock jock obviously thought he was behind the mic in the 2GB studio because he called every single friggin’ piece of play for eighty minutes. At times it was so hysterically rapid-fire, I wondered if he’d popped some special medicine before the game. That’s okay if you’re calling for the radio. His rugby league calls for 2GB are great and he's the best in the business.

But for TV, we see what’s going on. We don’t need those images of Quade Cooper kicking out-on-the full to be reinforced by a notorious loudmouth stating-the-obvious who clearly doesn’t understand the basic tenet of storytelling: show don’t tell!

This is something the great sports commentators understand. All of them. Like football’s Martin Tyler, the NBA’s Marv “Yesss!” Albert and our very own Richie Benaud, the doyenne of cricket commentators around the world. Their calm, measured, reassuring tones are every bit as important to the coverage as the games they call. More often than not, they add colour and enjoyment to the occasion.

Grate Ray’s gabfest deserves its place in the “Commentators Hall-of-Shame” right next to Kate Fitzpatrick’s infamous one-test stint in the Channel Nine cricket commentary box during the Australia v Pakistan series in the summer of 1983/84.

But whereas Fitzpatrick was an actress taking part in a cheap publicity stunt, Hadley is apparently a pro. Based on last night’s performance, he should stick to radio. Or maybe go back to driving cabs.

There is a lesson to be learned from Channel Nine’s latest atrocity: less is more. Less Ray Hadley. More Gordon Bray.

Aussie Sports Movies Coming Soon

Wed, 26 Oct 2011 03:18:00 GMT

The Mad Chatter recently got up at all hours of the morning to watch The Jackie Robinson Story on community station TVS.

Robinson was a six-time All-Star, National League MVP, World Series champion, Hall of Fame second-baseman for the famed Brooklyn Dodgers. He was named in the Major League Baseball team of the century and in 1997 had his famous #42 jersey retired by the league. Not just by the Dodgers but by every ball-club.

Trophies and stats sell Robinson’s legend short because he was more than just a ball-player. In 1947, he broke baseball’s colour line, becoming the first African-American to play in the majors. No wonder Hollywood came calling.

But it was probably a mistake to let Robinson star in his own biopic because as an actor he makes one helluva ball-player.

Thankfully, the producers of The Cup, the new Aussie film out tomorrow, cast real actors in the big-screen version of Damien Oliver’s emotional Melbourne Cup win in 2002 on Media Puzzle only days after his brother Jason was killed in a race trial fall.

Directed by Simon Wincer (Phar Lap) and starring Stephen Curry as Oliver, Daniel MacPherson, Shaun Micallef, Brendan Gleeson and the late Bill Hunter in his last role as legendary trainer Bart Cummings, The Cup is that rarest of creatures: an Aussie sports movie.

Most Australian films are made on the smell of an oily rag. Throw in big casts, especially for teams, and action sequences and the budget for a sports movie quickly spirals out-of-control and out-of-reach of the typical local filmmaker.

Hopefully, The Cup is a critical and commercial hit, paving the way for more Aussie sports movies. Here’s some The Mad Chatter would gladly fork out money to see...

The ’74 Socceroos

This is the kind of classic underdog story that Disney does so well (Miracle, Glory Road, The Rookie). Basically, you could pitch this as The Full Monty with a football and attract the ultimate All-Star Aussie cast. Picture this: Eric Bana as coach Rale Rasic, Sam Worthington as fading star Johnny Warren and Geoffrey Rush as soccer administrator Sir Arthur George. Somebody get P.J. Hogan or Robert Luketic, Australian directors who have helmed big-budget character-driven comedies, on the line.

Keith Miller

Playboy. WWII fighter pilot. Swashbuckling champion cricketer. Miller was a charismatic, handsome, dashing figure adored by the public yet troubled by a messy personal life. Legend has it he had a dalliance with Princess Margaret and would be snuck into Buckingham Palace in the boot of a car for late-night rendezvous’. Only one man could really do Keith Miller justice: Hugh Jackman. We’ve just gotta stop him baring his adamantium claws as Wolverine for five minutes.

Australia II

Just add water and watch the budget blow-out. It’s probably easy to forget how big winning the America’s Cup was back in 1983. I mean, the whole nation stopped for a yacht race! If Cadel Evans winning the 2011 Tour de France is the greatest sporting achievement by an Australian individual then Australia II, skippered by John Bertrand, ending 132 years of American dominance is probably the greatest sporting achievement by an Australian team. Realistically, only Baz Luhrmann and Dr. George Miller could get the kind of crazy money needed to make this project happen.

Dale Buggins

This 17 year-old daredevil from Wyong on the NSW Central Coast was a superstar in the late-70s/early-80s. The Robbie Maddison of his day, Buggins broke every bone in his body on his way to smashing all of Evel Knievel’s world records. Tragically, Dale couldn’t cope with the pressures of fame and committed suicide when he was just twenty. Focus on his world-record 25-car jump in 1978 and “Dale Buggins” could be a fist-pumping Rocky-type triumph.

Super League War

The wounds might still be too raw for this to go into production just yet. But there’s no doubt the turbulent events in rugby league between 1995-1997 would make an engrossing TV mini-series. Channel Nine, which will screen a mini-series about Kerry Packer and the World Series Cricket revolution next year, is the logical choice to make this. Underbelly: Super League coming soon.

Steven Bradbury

Sliced leg. Four litres of blood lost. One-hundred and eleven stitches. Eighteen months rehab. Broken neck. Two snapped vertebrae. A decade of struggle. That’s just some of the obstacles Bradbury had to overcome to win Australia’s first Winter Olympics gold medal in the 1000m short track speed skate event in 2002. However, the nature of his win make this film a tough sell: mass pile-ups in the semi-final and final saw Bradbury skate across the finish line as literally the last man standing. This bizarre climax is straight out of one of those taking-the-piss sports movies starring Will Ferrell.

The Cup opens nationwide in cinemas on October 13. Let's hope it's a beauty!!

Bound for Glory: Angry Anderson and the Batmobile at the 1991 AFL Grand Final

Wed, 26 Oct 2011 03:21:00 GMT

Let's face it, the only reason anybody watches the grand final “entertainment” is to see an epic disaster. This week marks the twentieth anniversary of perhaps the biggest horror show involving song, dance and choreography ever seen at a major sporting event.

History books show that Hawthorn beat West Coast by 53 points to win the 1991 AFL Grand Final in front of 75,320 at VFL Park, the only time the biggest game of the year was played out at Waverly before dozers flattened the joint and it became a housing estate as well as Hawthorn Hawks HQ.

Not that anybody gives a stuff.

Because most people remember September 28, 1991 as the day a baby blue Batmobile straight out of a bad high school Rock Eisteddfod act slugged its way out onto the ground for a motorcade of sporting champs. Hard-rocking former Rose Tattoo frontman Angry Anderson and retired marathon champ Rob DeCastella sat nervously in the brothel red back seat.

Within minutes, Angry was out-on-the-ground belting out a teeth-gnashing, eyeballs-bleeding, nails-scratching-down-a-blackboard rendition of his number one hit song “Bound for Glory”. The reaction of the sports stars in the motorcade was priceless.

Deek was looking for somewhere to hide. Boxing world champions Lionel Rose and Jeff Fenech were stunned. That year’s Brownlow Medallist Jim Stynes was equally bemused. Long-distance swimmer Susie Maroney typically had no idea what the hell was going on.

Then there was Seoul Olympics marathon silver medallist Lisa Martin and her husband, Kenyan world champion 5000m runner Yobes Ondieki. They completely lost it. Face in hand, almost crying with laughter, Yobes steals the whole ridiculous show. His blink-and-you’ll-miss-it cameo is so memorable that Carlton Draught used it as a tag for a recent ad that proclaims it has been a “proud supporter of footy since 1877... except in 1991”.

If there’s one criticism of Angry’s unforgettable performance - and there can only be one criticism of this magnificent aural nuke - it’s that he didn’t sing “Suddenly”, his 1987 smash hit which became a chart-topper worldwide thanks to Ramsay Street’s Romeo & Juliet. That’s right, I’m talking about the fairytale wedding of Scott and Charlene (Jason Donovan and Kylie Minogue) on Neighbours, still one of the highest-rating episodes on Australian TV. “Suddenly” is all over that cheese.

As the Batmobile wobbled out of the stadium, few thought they’d ever see it again. But years later, it bobbed up at the AFL Hall of Fame and Sensation exhibition in Melbourne. Earlier this year, some die-hard fans started the “Bring back Angry Anderson and the Batmobile for the 2011 Grand Final” group on Facebook. It currently has 47 members.

Last week, the Batmobile - which is actually a 1970 VG Valiant Coupe - popped up for sale on eBay with bids starting at a lazy seven-grand.

Owner and Collingwood supporter Michael Monaghan stumbled across it in a bad way when he went to check out a Valiant for sale in suburban Melbourne. He bought it on the spot and lovingly restored it.

Monaghan has promised to donate 50% of all funds raised in any sale above $10,000 to the Cerebral Palsy Education Centre. The Mad Chatter hopes the rest will be used to pay-off Angry so he never sings in public again. So far there have been no bids.

To view the 1991 AFL Grand Final shocker watch the You Tube video below. (or for those on Iphone/ipads follow this link http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c7J2madZVFA

Funny enough, “Bound for Glory” has since become a national sporting anthem. Rumour has it you can see the Batmobile in all its restored glory on Channel Ten’s Before the Game grand final show on Friday night.

What other sports “entertainment” disasters do you fondly (and not-so-fondly) remember?

Why The Poker Machine Proposal Is Stupid

Wed, 26 Oct 2011 05:26:00 GMT

It's probably no surprise after reading the title of this blog that I am not in favour of the proposed changes to poker machine laws in Australia. I'll outline my reasons below but before I get stuck into it, I will acknowledge that problem gamblers do create problems, but I don't believe controlling those in control in the answer.

Furthermore, if the intent is to stop problem gamblers then why isn't Andrew Wilkie and Julia Gillard's sights also set on the TAB, online gambling, ANZAC Day, frog races, flies racing up the wall....you catch my drift.

As we all know, one of the key conditions that independent Andrew Wilkie required before he and the other independents catapulted Julia Gillard into the Lodge was poker machine reform. Wilkie has been banging on about this for years and saw an opportunity when the last election ended in a draw. No golden point, no extra time, no Grand Final replay - these independents joined forces and awarded the victory to the Labor Government on the proviso they all received three wishes from the new genie of Australian politics.

The basic theme behind wild Wilkie's mandatory pre-commitment scheme is that punters would have to register, and then also set a pre-determined daily limit on what you wanted to spend on the pokies. This system would be linked up across all pubs, clubs and casinos in Australia. This will stop people losing their hard-earned in one place, then walking next door to gamble some more. Wilkie also wants to place a $250 daily limit on punters. This is probably the only proposal that does not include means-testing in the history of the Australian Labor Party. So whether you earn $30,000 a year or $3,000,000 a year, the limit will be $250 a day.

Today the AFL Clubs will join forces with the NRL and discuss how they will also support Clubs Australia in their bid to have the proposal over turned. The campaign It's Un-Australian and Won't Work Will Hurt have commenced and will get plenty of publicity leading up to this weekend's grand finals.

Below are my reasons why I think the proposal is stupid and won't work. Not sure how you feel about it all, but I never voted for Andrew Wilkie and I don't want his pet-project forced upon me. I also don't want my local pubs and clubs to stop supporting local sport. Australia is facing an obesity epidemic. We need as much money going into sport as possible. Andrew Wilkie represents the Federal seat of Denison in Tasmania and not the views of all Australians.

Reason 1: The cost to clubs and pubs to introduce

Clubs Australia anticipate it will cost them and pubs about $3 billion dollars to implement. About 50% of all pokies are older ones and wont be able to support this new system and the other 50% will require software upgrades. All of these costs at the moment will have to be paid for by the clubs and pubs themselves. This means clubs and pubs will lose staff and not have as much money to support community projects, especially supporting sport.

Reason 2: The experts say it wont work

The Salvation Army and gambling researchers at leading Australian and international universities say setting a limit will have the opposite impact on problem gamblers. They say problem gamblers will set unrealistic limits, and then gamble to those amounts. No country in the world where these limits have been introduced has reduced problem gambling.

Reason 3: Why focus just on pokies?

Problem gamblers will find other places to gamble. Has Andrew Wilkie and Julie Gillard heard of the TAB, black jack tables, online betting, online casinos?? Why focus just on pokies?? Stupid!! What about during sporting telecasts?? You cant watch Friday night footy or the cricket without every second advertisement promoting some online gambling company. Channel 9 is even crossing live to betting agencies for updated odds....Surely that promotes gambling more than the pokies.

Reason 4: Creating a nanny state

When did the government think it was alright to tell me what I can and can not spend my money on?? If I want to have a gamble, that is my choice and I must take responsibility for my wins and losses. Are they going to introduce a licence on shopping to stop Mrs Mad Chatter buying things at the shops?? I doubt it. Telling me how much and when I can gamble is not the government's job.

Reason 5: Hurting the masses

I admit problem gamblers are indeed a problem. But why should a $3 billion dollar un-proven and not publicly supported system be introduced when it will affect everyone and not just the problem gamblers. The government would be better to target problem gamblers and not target the masses. The blanket approach will not work and problem gamblers will find away around it. In the meantime, I have to fill out paperwork, the club has to hire more staff to help me with the paperwork, all so I can put $20 in with my mates....Come on!! Get real. Speaking of mates, if I have four of us playing together does that mean we can have 4 x $250 a day.....This is stupid.

I could probably go on with another 20 reasons but I encourage you to visit the Clubs Australia, It's Un-Australian and Won't Work Will Hurt websites to see what the gambling experts themselves have to say. I back them over some pelican from Tasmania who has a vendetta against poker machine players and the pokies themselves.

Stopping problem gamblers is a noble cause but a blanket approach is wrong in my opinion.

I understand the Gillard Government needs the support of the independents to stay in power. Andrew Wilkie has stated that he will withdraw support from the Gillard Government if the mandatory pre-commitment scheme is not introduced. With a large proportion of Aussies against this stupid proposal, looks like Gillard needs a feature within a feature from her last spin to save herself from a loss on this issue!! She might even need to 'suit' it a few times.......

Below is the first of a series of advertisements we'll be seeing on our screens soon.

( If you're on an iphone or ipad you may need to visit http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2WBTS_LBXcM&feature=player_embedded )

So what are your thoughts on the pokie proposal? Leave a comment to show you support or anger against the proposal.

Freo, Heave-Ho! - Frematle and St Kilda's Ross Lyon Stun AFL World

Wed, 26 Oct 2011 05:35:00 GMT

Nobody saw that coming, least of all Mark Harvey and the St. Kilda Football Club.

Well, that’s not exactly true.

Freo officials and Ross Lyon had obviously been in cahoots for weeks plotting one of the greatest acts of bastardry seen in “professional” Australian sport.

That’s a fair effort considering the calibre of bastards we’ve seen over the years.

When Mark Harvey took over from Chris Connolly as Dockers coach late in 2007, the club was typically in all-sorts.

Harvs pretty much went back to year zero and put his faith in the kids, a brave move in a club built on player scraps from their rivals. After a tough couple of years, Freo surged into the top eight last year, winning a home final against the Hawks.

Season 2011 started out with so much promise but was killed off by an horrific run of injuries. The Dockers could’ve had Mick Malthouse in charge and they still would’ve limped out of the finals race.

Over the same period, “Ross the Boss” took the Sainters to three grand finals in two years, coming agonizingly close to winning a flag, two flags even.

Then came last night’s bombshell. Out: Harvey. In: Lyon.

Stuff like this can tear footy clubs apart. Where does the loyalty of staff, players and supporters lie?

Ah, there’s that word again: “loyalty”. We all know “loyalty”, the most abused word in professional sport, went out with the biff. Still doesn’t stop jilted clubs playing the “loyalty card” whenever a star player leaves.

And you can bet “loyalty” won’t be mentioned by the grubs with blood on their hands at today’s media conference.

Freo have been a bad joke for most of their sixteen years in the AFL. But they’ve been a solo act the whole time. Now, with Lyon in charge, they’ve formed one helluva comedy duo.

So forget Laurel and Hardy, Abbott and Costello, Gra-Gra and Bert, because the Freo and Lyon show is coming soon to a ground near you.

Just make sure you bring a basket full of rotten fruit to ping at the bastards.

Back To The Future At Adelaide Oval

Wed, 07 Sep 2011 22:44:00 GMT

The first AFL match for premiership points at Adelaide Oval was a huge success.

A bumper crowd of 29,314 turned up for the Port Adelaide versus Melbourne clash, more than double the Power’s previous home game against the Western Bulldogs. Port got up by eight points, a rare highlight in a dismal year, avoiding the club’s first wooden-spoon since 1900.

Channel Seven commentator Bruce McAvaney, an old Adelaide boy, compared the electric atmosphere to the glory days of the SANFL, when 50,000-plus would cram into Adelaide Oval on grand final day. The record crowd for the venue is 62,543 for the 1965 grand final between Port and Sturt. Port won a nail-biter that day, too.

Nine years later, the SANFL moved to the state-of-the-art Football Park, fifteen minutes out of the city in fast-growing West Lakes. To cut a long, angry, bitter, story short, the winter tenants finally got jack of being been treated like second-class citizens by its summer landlords.

The last SANFL grand final at the Adelaide Oval in 1973 between perennial strugglers Glenelg and North Adelaide, reigning back-to-back premiers and Champions of Australia, is one of the best games of footy ever played.

It was an epic, see-sawing, high-scoring affair. North led by five points deep into time-on of the last quarter. A hat-trick of premierships was in the bag.

Enter star Glenelg ruck-rover Graham Cornes.

“Studley” had been pretty quiet for most of the day but as the clock ticked past 32 minutes he took an absolute screamer. Exhausted, Cornes calmly went back and kicked truly from thirty metres out, giving the Tigers a one-point lead.

Glenelg held on in the final frantic, desperate minutes to win their first premiership since 1934.

Call The Mad Chatter sentimental, a sports romantic, a big girl’s blouse if you must, but it would’ve been a nice touch to see Studley’s son Kane, who’s been putting up big numbers for Glenelg in the SANFL in recent weeks, out on the hallowed ground in a Port guernsey rather than up in the stands in a hoodie.

Nearly thirty years later, the warring parties of cricket and Aussie rules have called a truce and are once again co-tenants at Adelaide Oval. AFL boss Andrew Demetriou has stated that ending the civil war between the SACA and the SANFL will be his greatest legacy as CEO.

South Australian footy, cricket and sports fans in general will be big winners for years to come. What are your thoughts on the move back to the Adelaide Oval?

SCG: The Home of Real Footy

Thu, 01 Sep 2011 01:49:00 GMT

SEPTEMBER is back, which means just as we’ve finally got over our winter aches and pains, ills, colds and chills, we’re hit hard by a heavy dose of finals fever.

This year’s minor round saw some familiar patterns emerge: Collingwood is still the team to beat, Chris Judd is still the best player in the game, Eddie McGuire still thinks the AFL is a one-team comp, Sheeds is still a media harlot and Richmond still teases its supporters like a stripper giving a lap-dance at Men’s Gallery.

Oh, and the SCG is still the best ground in the country to watch footy.

That’s not a stuff-up. You read that right. Read it again just to make sure. Slowly and let it sink in. Read it? Okay, let’s move on.

The SCG is the best ground to watch footy because it’s the closest thing to an old suburban ground in today’s nice, family-friendly, plastic-as-uncomfortable-terrace-seating AFL.

First up, aesthetics. The SCG is a dog’s breakfast, a mis-match of stands from different eras, centuries and millenniums. No uniformity here. The only thing missing are practice cricket pitches and nets along the boundary (they’re out back behind the Members Stand).

Then there’s the intimacy. Smaller than all the concrete jungles in Melbourne, Brisbane and Perth (Adelaide has to make do with that shanty-town for another couple of years just yet). You almost feel like you’re part of the action at the SCG. At some games, where rival supporters don’t travel, you can even stand in certain sections, beer and pie in hand.

Now, I can already tell you’re drifting off to years gone by at Victoria Park, Moorabbin and Windy Hill, so let’s turn our attention to the game itself. Where else can you see the game the way it should be played, the way you remember it being played, the way you played it growing up before rolling zones, machine-gun fire interchanges and Gary Ablett (God) only knows what else?

At a Swans match you’ll see long kicks to a contest, tough no-frills footy and accountable players manning up on the opposition. Still not convinced? Last year, recently-retired Swans full-forward Daniel Bradshaw kicked a goal from 55m out on the boundary with - wait for it - a monster torpedo punt (screw punt). No lie: an actual torp! (screwy!)

Finally, atmosphere. Swans fans are every bit as one-eyed and knowledgeable as any other footy fan. The umpy is a cheat, their players can do no wrong and they cry “Ball!” for everything and anything at full voice over four quarters. Basically, they're as biased as you are. Footy tipping competitions, online betting and Supercoach have made Swans fans armchair experts, too.

There’s some things Sydney Swans fans could do better to enrich the SCG experience. Like incoherently curse-out umpires and rival players, not be so polite to opposition supporters and dress-down a bit to at least give the impression they actually go to watch the game and not just for pre-drinks before a night at The Ivy.

So, as die-hard Saints fan Molly Meldrum would say, “do yourself a favour” and, by plane, train, automobile - hell, walk if you have to - get down to the SCG this weekend for some real footy. You'll have a blast. It'll be just like the good ol' days.

Well sort of.....

Do you agree with me?

Manly and Des Hasler Don't Get It

Wed, 31 Aug 2011 00:43:00 GMT

The Manly coach Des Has-Been Hasler, the Manly players, the Manly Board and Manly fans are amongst the most arrogant and misguided bunch of battlers I have ever come across in my opinion. They cry when anything happens and the fall-out from what is being termed 'Black Friday' simply strengthens the case against these pelicans. Anyone else notice how the whole world is against Manly according to fans and anyone associated with the club?? What a load of BS!!

I'm not going to get into the debate about who started the fight in the Manly Sea Eagles v Melbourne Storm match from last week except to say no one in rugby league would argue against the initial sin-binning of Glenn Stewart and Adam Blair for their involvement in the first punch up. No one in rugby league would disagree with these clowns being sent-off for their second punch up on the way to the sin-bin. The referees got this one spot on.

What people do care about is that players from both sides came running from all directions to help. This was a bad look, not acceptable and the NRL rightly charged 10 players for their involvement in the fight.

What I'm blowing up about is the rhetoric from Manly officials following this fight that they were 50% responsible for. Some would even argue they are more than 50% responsible. Manly lovers whinge that the NRL has a vendetta against them and the world isn't fair...Um it was your players who came charging in, some ran from more than 30 metres, and escalated what was simply a one on one fight. If there was no involvement from Manly in that fight, then there would be no involvement from the NRL - so get off your high-horse you morons and for once take responsibility for your own actions.

Both Melbourne and Manly were fined $50,000. So what did Des Has-Been Hasler have to say about it all.....

"The Manly club has decided to accept the $50,000 fine and move on, which is probably the smartest thing to do - to put the distraction well and truly behind us and not make it too protracted. We can move forward."

What a self righteous thing to say. The Manly mullet is saying that the fine is a distraction and for the good of the game they'll cop and not let this drag on any further. He is also saying they'll accept the fine. Well Des, if your blokes had not run 30m and attacked the head of an opposition player and not been responsible for escalating a one on one blew, then no need for the fines so don't now pretend that you're helping the game out by copping the fine and not letting it drag on. If you want to help the game, how about you apologise on behalf of the players for what was an ordinary act. Craig Bellamy from Melbourne should do the same!! "decided to accept the fine...not make it protracted..." Give us a break Des, please!! You don't get it do you. These comments come from the same bloke who said the solution to concussion in rugby league was to make the field bigger.....Clearly an intelligent bloke...You decide....

Hasler has also carried on and suggested the NRL use the fine money to employ sideline officials to make sure players leave the field of play without any incidents. Well Has-Been, the NRL already employs sideline officials to manage the interchange but why should the NRL change the rules because of one act of stupidity by Manly and Melbourne players? Most players have enough intelligence to walk off the field without incident. Again Des Has-Been Hasler should be looking closer to home as to why this all-in-brawl happened. I can tell you now Has-Been, it didn't start because the NRL did not have sideline officials....Manly don't get it do they.....

There is still a massive hang-over of ill feelings from Manly towards the NRL over the Brett Stewart drama from not yesterday, not last week, but from 2009. Get over it. When troublemaker and chief Pelican Glenn Stewart was interviewed last week before the Black Friday match, he was told NRL boss David Gallop, who by the way has done an outstanding job through all of this, was going to be attending the biggest match of the year, according to the Daily Telegraph he acted like a mug.

"Is he definitely coming?? Oh well - we'll just wait and see what happens when he gets there."

It had an air of menace about it. Gallop was surrounded by security guards when he was walking through the crowd at Brookvale so one-eyed Manly fans didn't assault him.

These are the same fans that cried when Brett Stewart was suspended by the NRL for getting drunk and acting like a pelican at the season opener and bringing the game into disrepute. These same Manly fans and even Has-Been Hasler conveniently forget that the decision to suspend Brett Stewart was based on Manly's own report to the NRL that said he was as drunk as ten men.

How easy the Manly club forgets and points the fingers at everybody else!! I'm not even going to mention the other incident after the season opener.

Now before Manly supporters read this and blow up asking about my thoughts on the Melbourne Storm, well I also think their players acted in an ordinary manner. However, we haven't heard Craig Bellamy or Melbourne Board members carrying on in the media and making smug remarks. Is it any surprise to you that of the ten players charged, only Glenn Stewart from Manly is pleading not guilty....All the other players including all the Storm players have indicated they will plead guilty.

Please Manly for once actually take responsibility for your own actions and stop blaming everyone else in the world for your actions. I have a feeling after tonight's NRL judiciary we'll be hearing more complaining from the Manly club as they blame the NRL and suggest there is a conspiracy against them when Manly players involved in the punch up are suspended.

I'll Be Watching The A-League - Will You?

Fri, 26 Aug 2011 03:16:00 GMT

We're set for the most exciting season of domestic football in Australia's history. The 2011 A-League season kicks off on October 8 and finally some big Aussie names have decided to return to our shores and the domestic competition and I can't wait!!

After an eternity of secret meetings and phone calls, Harry Kewell has finally signed on with Melbourne Victory this week for a three-year deal. Harry will arrive in early September to begin preparations for the upcoming season.

Sydney FC was also in the hunt for Kewell but they blind-sided everyone and have announced the signing of Australia finest football ambassador Brett Emerton. The second highest capped Socceroo will join Sydney FC also on a three-year deal and I think he'll prove the better buy!!

Emerton who was born and bred in Sydney returns home after an awesome 11-year career in Europe where he played 338 matches. He has also played 87 matches for the Socceroos and represented Australia at the 2006 and 2010 World Cups. He is still a vital member of the national team and has stated he is keen to be there at the 2014 World Cup in Brazil.

Both of these blokes will earn more than all of us put together but it's just awesome having guys of this calibre back playing in Australian football. As a general sports fan who leans more towards the rugby league, aussie rules and the rugby union, I'll definitely be watching more of the A-League with these two legends playing. Emerton and Kewell's inclusion in Australian football for the next three years will definitely raise the profile of the sport, get more general sports fans through the turnstyles and attract more sponsorship.

I for one can't wait for Round 1 when Sydney FC hosts Melbourne Victory and we see these guys go head to head. I've been critical of the Football Federation of Australia in the past but this time they have made the right choice, bent the rules and put the greater good of the game before anything else by paving the way for Kewell and Emerton to return.

Bring on October 8....Will you be watching?

Why Support Port Adelaide?

Wed, 24 Aug 2011 23:35:00 GMT

Port Adelaide is a basket case.

Record losses on and off the ground have turned South Australia’s oldest, proudest and most successful football club into a national joke.

Rival club supporters who’ve had to cop it for years from arrogant Port fans are having a field day. But for Power supporters, it’s not so funny.

Port is the AFL’s worst team since the dying days of Fitzroy in 1996. Ironically, the Power took the Lions place in the comp the following season.

Ignore the hysterical shrieks of die-hard fans, the Power’s shocking demise this season is not some Fabian-type conspiracy orchestrated by a bitter, jealous and parochial South Australian National Football League as payback for Port’s ill-fated rebel bid to join the AFL in 1990.

Poor player list management, an under-resourced coaching department and a dysfunctional front office are more likely causes.

Frontrunning supporters have to take a hard look at themselves, too. For 140 years they’ve had a dream run as Port dominated the SANFL with 34 premierships before quickly becoming an AFL powerhouse. The club only took seven years to win its first AFL flag in 2004.

These people have long bragged about being the most loyal, passionate, committed through thick-and-thin footy supporters going around. But only 14,169 bothered to show up for Port’s 59-point loss to the Western Bulldogs last Sunday, the second lowest AFL crowd at AAMI Stadium (the lowest is 14,113 for the Power's home game against West Coast last year). They’ve deserted the club in its darkest hour.

Truth is, this is the first time ANY Port supporter has had to endure the “tough times”. Old-timers point to the premiership drought between 1966-1976. They don’t mention that the club only missed the finals once in that time while playing off in six grand finals.

Hardly struggle street.

The move to Adelaide Oval in 2014 is not the panacea for Port’s ills, which go much deeper than anything a simple venue change can cure.

AFL boss Andrew Demetriou has repeatedly guaranteed Port’s survival in the comp. But for how long?